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In my previous article, I expounded on how I would have written the Star Wars prequels. However, even with the films as they are, many scenes could have been so much better. Here’s one particularly egregious example from what is admittedly the strongest of George Lucas’s prequels, Revenge of the Sith. The attempted arrest of Palpatine by Mace Windu and three other Jedi, the subsequent duel, and Anakin’s decision to make the leap to the dark side, is handled with staggering ineptitude. Here’s how I would have changed it.

Alanis Morissette famously complained that rain on a wedding day was ironic, when in fact that was just bad luck. However, she isn’t alone in her confusion regarding the nature of irony. Despite the standard definitions of verbal, situational, and dramatic irony, it’s a tricky concept to explain, and even trickier to consciously nail in fiction (some of the ironies in my own novels have been happy accidents). However, ironic stories are extremely satisfying to read or watch when the concept is properly understood.

One method of crafting an ironic story is to create a central protagonist with a convincingly…

It is generally agreed that George Lucas’s Star Wars prequels were a disappointment. Despite being technically proficient, with outstanding visual effects, production design, music score, and the odd thrilling lightsabre duel, the storytelling was largely a plodding bore of trade disputes and ludicrous dialogue about sand. My big issues with the prequels had nothing to do with Jar Jar Binks, and everything to do with wasting the chance to create a set of films on a par with the original classic trilogy.

An alternative treatment

My own treatment for the Star Wars prequels, written in posthumous frustration, went something like this: Episode I…

Features

An observation from unemployment purgatory: Modern job advertisements generally fall into two categories.

The first is the impenetrable corporate nonsense ad. Filled with interminable waffle about “scaling”, “pipelining”, and “drilling down”, they sound more like dentists or oil prospectors, and necessitate an immediate Google search to try and decipher what the bloody hell a KPI or B2B might be. In such ads, I don’t understand why everyone wants to “disrupt the space”, “disrupt the narrative”, or “disrupt the concept”. When did the working world get so disruptive?

The second kind involves vague invitations issued by tech-obsessed, bearded hipster entrepreneurs, who…

Anyone as obsessed with cinema as I am, for as long as I have been, will wind up with a list much like this one, detailing favourite shots and transitions. These choices are the cineaste’s equivalent of classic literary quotes. I would hesitate to say these are absolutely definitive bests, as many alternative selections would be just as great. But for now, this lot gets rubber-stamped with “personal favourite”.

Favourite Opening Shot: Star Wars (1977)

The beginning of George Lucas’s Star Wars, wherein a small rebel spaceship is pursued by a vast, seemingly unending pursuing craft, was so much more than an exhilarating opening shot when…

One of my as-yet-unpublished children’s novels is a very dark fairy tale. A horror story for children. The scariness envelope is deliberately pushed to the absolute limit.

I was intrigued to note the reaction from adult beta readers versus child beta readers. The adult readers were horrified, greatly disturbed by some of the imagery and events in my story, and insisted it was far too scary. By contrast, the child readers loved it, but also made some merciless criticisms, including that it wasn’t scary enough!

Writing children’s fiction is exceptionally tricky. My children’s novels are pitched at the Harry Potter/Alex…