I understand your need to get things out of your system in writing. However, I am also pleased the comments section has been filled with support and you have replied to the effect that you are staying, sticking it out, and moving on from this stumble.

I'd also add that I believe you will not only get through this, but will one day sooner than you think define yourself in radically different terms.

I'm not really a hugs person, but consider this a virtual hug of sorts, and an affirmation that I consider you a remarkable individual, regardless of how many mistakes you have made.