It is precisely because you don't intend your parallels that they are so potent in your writing. This is the essence of great storytelling - not self-consciously trying to insert messages or ideas, but telling a story with emotional honesty and no agenda. Then what is important to you, what troubles you, what reveals the essence of who you are, is inherent in the text. I write a bit about this principle here, if you're interested, but the point is you already do that wonderfully. You use your pain in the best way possible. :)